EXCLUSIVE: “Websites are Unreliable”

19th February 2003

Random Perspective has concluded its 6-day study into the reliability of Websites in providing their readers with reliable and regular updates.

We have concluded that websites are unreliable, often providing their viewers with fabricated information and go through periods without updates for several days. Sometimes even as long as a week or two.

What’s more, when these updates do happen their webmasters come up with ridiculous reasons like “I lost my FTP password.”, “I was on holiday.” Or even more bizarrely “My computer was hooked up to the TV to play DVDs for a few days.”

To persuade you that they were spending their time constructively they will then quickly rush off a pointless update and dress it up as some form of special, attention grabbing article which doesn’t really tell you anything and serves to do little more than to waste your time. They will then add to this a closing paragraph in which they state some radical over the top advice, which you may or may not agree with, but won’t actually carry out.

To avoid exposure to this sort of unprofessional conduct Random Perspective advises you to terminate your internet link and burn your computer in a massive demonstration to Webmasters that what they are doing isn’t good enough.

Please note: If Random Perspective goes for another great length of time without an update then you will know that I have done this very same thing.