People Allowed To Clone Babies So Long As They Keep Them As Pets - April 28th 2004
Scientists in America have found a loop hole in the country’s legal system preventing them from cloning human beings – they have can clone human babies so long as they keep the clones as pets.
“It was great when I found this loophole,” said mad scientist Chuck Hankman, “As soon as I found out I took my nine month old son out of his cot, attached a lead to him and talk him for a brisk walk down to the lab.”
Chuck Hankman is one of America’s leading scientists in the industry of human cloning, which given the fact that it was generally considered to be illegal was not very large. Since the discovery that the cloning of pets was no banned, Professor Hankman expects to see a massive reverse in this trend.
“People are playing $50,000 dollars to have their cat cloned!” he exclaimed, “$50,000 just for a cat. And what fun are they? All they do is scratch the furniture and bring back dead vermin into the house.
“A baby makes a far more useful pet, and it’s even less hassle than a cat. Sure you are thinking diapers and breast feeding but you’d be wrong. You don’t have to bother with diapers as its now only a pet! As for breast feeding, how many people breast feed their cat? Granted, some weirdos probably do, but most just put a saucer of milk on the floor and let it lap it up.”
Several Animal Rights organisations have voiced their concerns with the proposed baby cloning schemes:
“Our shelters are already overrun with unwanted cats and dogs,” their spokesperson revealed in a press statement, “To start adding unwanted cloned pet babies to this would overstretch them to breaking point. We already have to kill 4 million animals each year because they are not wanted. And I don’t think we would be allowed to do this with babies – even if they are given to us as pets.”
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