International News

World Affairs. Things that are happening that affect everyone.

1. British and American Government Reach Consensus on Math vs Maths Debate
2. Egyptian President quits after Protesters launch Facebook Page
3. Peter the Great to get Putinized?
4. Chile Rescues "Property of Bart Simpson" Walkie Talkie from Mine
5. EU forces Catholic Church to offer "Religion Choice" prior to Baptism
6. Toyota CEO Issued With 6,397,345 Speeding Tickets
7. RyanAir Unveils "Urinate in your seat" Cost-saving Policy
8. April 2nd Started 1 Day Early
9. Western Tourists Amused by Thailand Coup
10. Random Perspective listed 3rd on Al-Qaeda's Priorities List
11. 75% of Americans Believe Everything They Read
12. Holland Officially More Gullible Than USA
13. Business Booming for Danish Flag Maker
14. Saddam Hussein to Hire Michael Jackson's Lawyer
15. Marlboro Cancels ‘Kiddarettes’ Programme
16. Australia Currently Leading the Tsunami Relief Competition
17. Mark Baese Revealed to be Heir of Gullibavaria Island
18. Tragedy as Thousands of Western Tourists are Stranded in Asia
19. Bush and Blair Lock in Passionate Embrace During Press Conference
20. John Kerry Elected President of San Andreas
21. Broken Telephone Forces Blair to Fly to White House
22. Budweiser Admits They Have Added Ecstasy – Not Caffeine – to “B-to-the-E”
23. United Nations to Outlaw Vegetarianism in New Environmental Guidelines
24. Liberals Would Rather Saddam Hussein Receive Death Penalty Through a Fair Trial
25. Bush Cancels Invasion of Canada
26. Bush Plans To Demolish International Embarrassment With Abu Ghraib Prison
27. Flour-Filled Condom Attack “The New September 11th” Declares Press
28. World Shocked As Pope Remains Undead
29. Public Opinion Of Bush Administration Saved By The Beheading Of Nicholas Berg
30. Increasing Number of Pet Owners Putting Themselves In Danger
31. US Troops Urges Britain To Move To Baghdad
32. World’s Media Disappointed No Major Landmarks Were Destroyed In Madrid Attacks
33. First French Troops Surrender In Haiti
34. Red Cross Determines That Captured Saddam Hussein Is A Mannequin
35. Europe’s Future Safe In The Hands of Britain, France And Germany
36. Bush Urges Europeans To Share The Death Toll
37. US Apologises For Accidentally Dropping 2,500 Practice-Bombs on Iraq
38. “I smoke 40 a day” George Bush Tells Koreans
39. End of Iraq Conflict Leaked Early on Internet
40. Chirac Desperate, Calls British “Friends”
41. US Angry That Israel Attacked Syria First
42. World’s Oldest Man May Be Lying
43. Dead Man Told that He'll Never Fly a Plane, Play a Piano or Have Sex Again.
44. Starving Child in Africa Volunteers to Trade Places with David Blaine
45. God’s Lightning Bolt Machine Breaks Down – Unable to Electrocute Gene Robinson
46. Iraq Rotating Presidency System Will Be Alphabetically Ordered; ANtony Charles Linton Blair to Go First
47. US Bury the Bodies of Saddam’s Sons; Soldier Who Shot Them Hangs Their Heads on his Wall.
48. US Received Intelligence That Saddam Has Recently Quit Major British (Terrorist) Organisation.
49. Internet Community Pleads With Bush to Initiate World War 3
50. Ariel Sharon Suffers Triple Heart-attack, Falls Backwards Off of Chair and Questions Whether this is Reality
51. US Government Blames Fund Raising for World Water Problems
52. Bush Attends Political Meetings in his “Virtual Suit”
53. Rumsfeld fails to find Weapons of Mass Destruction, Blair sent in
54. Iraqi Information Minister Joins Random Perspective
55. Saeed al-Sahhaf Steals Car, Burns American Flags and Graffiti’s US Tanks but doesn’t get arrested
56. Random Perspective Forum to Replace United Nations
57. Bush Promises to Veto any French/Chinese Resolution on SARS
58. US Army Release Iraq-themed Playing Cards – Regime Based Monopoly to follow soon…
59. Only 3 Iraqis see Blair/Bush Broadcast
60. Iraqi Bullet Shot Across Border May Contain Chemical or Biological Agents
61. War with Iraq could destroy Ancient Artefacts
62. Bush and Blair Slip Laxative into French Representative’s Drink
63. Iraq Surrounds the Rest of the World
64. West Attempts to convince Saddam to convert to Democracy
65. Bush Outlines his plans for Iraq
66. USA Successfully Develops and Tests Time Machine
67. The Most Important Piece of News Ever
68. Blair Claims All Out War with Iraq will help deal with Asylum Seekers
69. 'Iraq' the only the word in New English Dictionary
70. Happy new January 6th!
71. Billions of Children are without Presents