Labour Claims Hutton Report is a “Boring Read”

27th January 2004

The Government has announced that after reading its advanced copy of the Hutton Report that they consider the report to be dull and uninspiring and suggests to people who are considering reading it to do something else with their time, like reading Harry Potter and the Order of Phoenix.

The Labour Party were given a copy of the report 24 hours before it is due o be released to the public, to allow them sufficient time to prepare any response to the issues raised, which could potentially cause serious harm to the reputation of both the party and Prime Minister Tony Blair.

On the party’s website, a review of the report gave the report 1 star, with a giant clipart image showing “thumbs down” and was put in the “One to Miss” category. The reviewer, who went by the initials PM, stated “You may think it is so boring you could read it to your kids to put them to sleep, but don’t – they’d end up killing themselves it’s so awful.”

The Conservatives have stood up in defiance of the Labour verdict of the text, stating that the Labour Party members are probably not educated enough to recognise such a brilliant work of fiction, and that even those not considering reading the report should give it a go.

In response to Labour’s suggestion that people read Harry Potter instead, the Liberal Democrats have suggested the Dossier on Iraq’s Weapons of Mass Destruction was a far better work of fiction.