Political heavyweight Ken Clarke has announced his intentions to stand against Sir Menzies Campbell in the upcoming Liberal Democrat leadership contest. The Conservative MP who has failed on 3 occasions to become leader of the Conservative party hopes that his fortunes will be reversed when he attempts to become leader of the rival party.

“To be honest,” Mr Clarke told us, “the Liberals would be fools not to vote for me – no one has more experience in standing in party leadership elections than I do.”

The format of the Lib Dem leadership is unknown, but many expect it to take the form of a popular TV Quiz. Just as the Tories voted out one member at a time Weakest-Link style – it is largely expected that the Liberal Democrats will base their leadership contest in the vein of the X-Factor.

Whilst Simon Cowell has not officially declared any intention to help develop such a process, he was seen meeting with Darius Danesh – someone with great experience in finishing third.

Ken Clarke has said that whilst the format has not yet been decided upon he would not be against a talent contest. His neighbours, meanwhile, disagree – after many sleepless nights of listening to him brush up on “The Final Countdown.”

Ken Clarke's move to the Liberal Democrats has not raised many eyebrows, with many more curious as to why it has taken so long for him to switch sides to the only remaining pro-Europe political party. Ken Clarke was quick to explain that until recently he would never have felt comfortable working for the Liberal Democrats as he previously would have had no use for his knife-proof jacket.