Football Pundits Complain Televised Dramatisation Not Accurate As France Beat England

13th July 2004

English Football Pundits criticised the Portuguese dramatisation of the England vs France football match following the shock twist featuring two France goals scored in injury time transforming the result from 1-0 to England to 2-1 to France.

“What can I say?” TV pundit and former England Manager Terry Venebles commented after the match had been broadcast, “It wasn’t like that in the script. Everyone knows that England should have walked away from that game as victors but the shock ending was so far fetched I can’t believe it was allowed to happen.”

According to hard core England fans, in the original draft England walked away from the match with a 2-0 lead, celebrating ecstatically in the street whilst the French manager cried and their defence went on strike.

In the broadcasted version England missed the fairly straightforward second goal and proceeded to concede two easily avoided counter attacks by the French in injury time. This shocked all English fans, particularly Keith Wilson:

“The decision to convert a two nil victory to a two one defeat shows a complete disrespect for the values of English football. Everyone who knows anything knows how it should have unfolded. It’s a much darker tone and the original had with the happy ending turned gloomy.

“Who knows what else to expect now? I’m hedging my bets on some football hooliganism and mass destruction of private property in the city centre of Lisbon. That’ll show those Portuguese for giving us that kind of result.”

Despite winning their game against England the French team have been severely criticised for their comeback by the French Government for making their comeback by President Chirac:

“I can not believe that Zidane and Henry continued to persist in fighting the English.” He explained, “Did they not learn from their forefathers? The English had clearly smashed their defence – from then on they should have been helping the English to score more goals, not launching a counterstrike. They obviously have no respect for the long time French tradition of surrender.”