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>> News > Internet
Random Perspective Celebrates First Year Without April 1st Update - April 1st 2006

Leading News Satire website, Random Perspective, has celebrated a major milestone by not updating on its annual celebration day of April 1st. For the first time in over 3 years of operation the website has failed to put up an update for its loyal readers to read.

The decision comes to a shock to most readers who had hoped the recent down turn in activity was going to culminate in a surprise update in which would be massive update with loads of new features. Many had believed that after 3 years of the hastily written Content Management System that launched on April 1st 2003 the new year will finally yield the Ultimate CMS that webmaster Ben Dickson had been dreaming about creating but failing to deliver or even tell people about.

However, due to some unforeseen circumstances Ben Dickson was unable to fulfil his duties of working on the website as he finally struck lucky in the areas of love and money:

“Yes, it is true.” Editor Ben Dickson revealed to his fans, “After years of being poor and repulsive to people of the opposite sex (well both sexes I guess as I haven't had any interest expressed in me on either front) I am finally going to be rich and with a woman.”

He attributed his upcoming success in love to Google Romance and his upcoming fortune to the Nigerian millionaire who keeps spamming people's mail boxes:

“Firstly, I would like to point out that people claim that Nigerian guy is just a spammer trying to con you out of your money. But he emails a whole shitload of people – I mean EVERYONE gets his emails and assume that because everyone else gets them they are spam. Had they ever considered that so send so many emails requires a huge amount of man power – that guy must employ an office load of people to send his emails which proves he has the money. You have no right to call me a fool until my cheque for £1,200 is cashed and I haven't received 6.4million 3 months later.

“Secondly, whilst it is true I do not have a girlfriend YET – I am going to sign up to Google Romance. Whilst this in itself does not instantly provide me with a girlfriend in the same way that eBay would if it sold women on Buy-it-now auctions – you have to remember this is Google. Anything Google does is a success. Remember the rumours they were buying Napster – Napster shares went through the roof. Hell, I bet that I will only need to click that “I'm feeling Lucky” button once in order to be smitten.”

Ben went on to explain that due to his new commitments he had been unable to divert any attention to creating a believable and worthwhile April Fools update and advised his users to look elsewhere on the net. He also invited his users to log on to the website in 4 weeks time to see the photos of his parachute jump from the top of the Empire State Building his friend had just recommended he sign up to.

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Disclaimer: Random Perspective accepts no responsibility for your believing of anything on this website.

The content on this website is satirical and thus many reports are unsubstantiated and therefore should not be considered factual. The use of major brands and corporations is used in good humour in order to improve the impact of the writing. Under no circumstances should you believe anything that could be considered defamatory without first checking it against a major news source.

IMPORTANT: If you do not appreciate or understand this article please consult your doctor as your right ventromedial prefrontal cortex is impaired.
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