EU forces Catholic Church to offer "Religion Choice" prior to Baptism

17th October 2010

The European Union today announced that it would be forcing the Catholic Church to offer a free choice of religions to all children prior to being baptised following complaints from other religious groups that the practices adopted by the Vatican meant they were unfairly using their monopoly of religions to further their competitive advantage.

The exact procedure has yet to be agreed upon, however the EU is said to favour a system that prior to the baptism the priest should hand the child a booklet with a list of different religions and a short description prepared by the religion in question explaining to the child why it should choose that particular religion.

The Vatician has expressed unhappiness at this suggestion, and said instead it would prefer to baptise the child, and then explain to the child there are other choices it could have and then offer an ‘unbaptising ceremony’ should the child wish to then convert to another faith.

Agnosticism was not included on the list as it could not make its mind up on what statement it should use to describe itself.

Many are supporting the EU’s decision to force the Catholic Church to offer different religions to its congregation prior to baptism following recent scandals and actions that many believe show that the church is behind the curve on social issues. From its hostile attitude towards homosexuality to its refusal to stop condemning condom use in Africa several groups have attached the Vatican for refusing to follow what they believe are now accepted world wide standards.

The Catholic Church has refuted these claims stating that the majority of its members do not experience any problems and that many other religions out there are far more unstable and non compliant. They also claimed that they are unfairly scrutinised due to being the worlds most widely practised religion.

The Vatican’s position is not the only source of controversy this week. Prior to a state visit to the United Kingdom, one of the Pope’s aides described Britain as being a Third World nation. Originally intended to join the Pope on his visit across Scotland and England the cardinal responsible for the statement will no longer be attending after coming down with gout. His views have been largely condemned as outrageous with most critics claiming he does not have a leg to stand on.