Bush Publishes List of Terrorists still Uncaught

28th January 2003

George W Bush has today revealed a list of major international terrorists that have still to be caught by US, or Allied, Intelligence Agencies.

The list, with Bush’s comments is as follows:

Dr. Evil.
I would have thought that Dr Evil would have been quite easy to catch but after raiding the Space Needle in Seattle it seems he had already fled in preparation. I suppose we should have been aware of his absence and realised something might be up.

Anne Froppik.
Miss Froppik’s name is one I have always heard used in conjunction with Saddam Hussein, Osama Bin Laden and even figures like Hitler and Stalin. I can only assume she must be quite elderly now which only makes me wonder why she is yet to be caught.

Albert Einstein
This guy was so evil he invented the Nuclear Bomb. If it weren’t for him then we wouldn’t have the possibility of Saddam Hussein obtaining a nuclear arsenal. I think that he should be brought straight to justice charged with aiding terrorists and terrorist regimes.

Free Speech
My Public Relations advisers keep telling me that Free Speech is responsible for most of my plans failing to get full support of the US population. This is surely treasonous behaviour and should be punished accordingly.