|End of Iraq Conflict Leaked Early on Internet - January 8th 2004|
US Officials have expressed their outrage at the leaking of the final stages of the Iraqi Conflict over the Internet today. At approximately 1251GMT, followers of the conflict were alerted to the fact that a digital copy made of the pre production material had appeared on the file sharing application Kazaa.
Every effort has been made to try and track down the perpetrators responsible for stealing the material but the producers are worried the damage has already been done:
“I’m really quite shocked,” the Executive Producer George W. Bush announced in a press conference, “I was keeping our final developments tightly under wraps so to surprise our audience until we finally presented it to them in the finished format but it seems that now is no longer an option.”
Director Donald Rumsfeld was equally disappointed: “I was particularly saddened to see that the scene in which all the Arab leaders knelt down and saluted the President of the USA was revealed. And the fact that George Bush wins the next two elections after repealing the 22nd Amendment.”
Fans who have downloaded the leaked material have ambivalent feelings towards what they have seen:
“There are parts I thought worked well and there are other parts I am particularly disappointed with.” Iraq War Fanatic Keith Wilson explained to us in an email:
“I was particularly fond of the scene in which that creep the Prime Minister of the United Kingdom was harpooned against the leg of a T-Rex and then had his head bitten off. That was really cool. He was really getting on my nerves with all this moral conscience crap and Weapons of Mass Destruction nonsense.
“But I didn’t like the scene in which Saddam Hussein was sent to death by hanging by an unanimous Iraqi population. I think that was another scene that could have used a dinosaur to kill the victim. Or maybe one of those ray guns that disintegrate you from the inside out in a very painful manner.
“My guess is they probably ran out of money too early on and then had to scrounge some more from the studio in order to get it finished on time.”
The producers have issued a statement declaring that whilst they might be forced to make minor adjustments following the leak, they do intend to remain as faithful to their original vision as possible, although it is unlikely the final version will include as many principle Iraqi figures speaking with American accents.”
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