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NASA’s Safety Record in Tatters as Second Spacecraft Plunges to a Fiery End - September 21st 2003
The North American Space Agency has found its safety record under further scrutiny as for the second time this year one of its spacecraft has fallen to an explosive end after plunging through the atmosphere.
Following the Columbia disaster earlier this year few predicted that that NASA’s reputation could get much worse following the death of all on board – except for the Type C Elegan Worm which was temporarily held under charges of terrorism at the request of President Bush.
However, although President Bush could not exact any concrete evidence to implicate the microscopic life form, a second NASA spacecraft – the Jupiter Probe Galileo - also believed to have stowaway microscopic life forms has also plunged to its destruction.
“This only serves to should that my mis-implications were not unfounded.” President Bush announced triumphantly, insisting the Elegan Worms from the Columbia disaster were immediately rearrested.
However, it later emerged that the reason that Galileo burned up in Jupiter’s atmosphere was because NASA decided to put the craft on a collision course with the gas giant in order to destroy any bacteria that the probe may contain. They did this to prevent the probe from contaminating Jupiter’s moons with Earth life forms.
This revelation has shocked critics:
“They intentionally crashed the spacecraft? What do they think this is – Destruction Derby with multi million dollar space probes?” Astronomer Chuck Hankman exclaimed on hearing the news.
“They didn’t want to run the risk of contaminating a moon with Earth bound life forms?” Professor Keith Wilson from Cambridge University queried, “What do they think they were famous for in 1969? If they hadn’t have contaminated one moon with Earth originating life forms then they probably wouldn't be funded today.”
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